Chapter 6 - Victoria Without a Crowd

I saw Victoria again in March.

She was leaving a bookstore.

I almost turned around.

She saw me first.

For several seconds, neither of us moved.

Then she said:

“Hi.”

“Hi.”

No friends.

No cameras.

No expensive school uniform.

She wore jeans and a gray sweater.

She looked younger.

“Can we talk?”

I hesitated.

“Five minutes.”

We sat at an outdoor table.

Victoria kept touching the edge of her sleeve.

“I didn’t know if you got my letter.”

“I did.”

“Okay.”

Silence.

“I’m not going to ask if you forgive me.”

“Good.”

She almost smiled.

“I’m seeing a therapist.”

I wasn’t sure how to answer.

“So?”

“Not because of you.”

“Okay.”

“My parents made me at first.”

That sounded more like Victoria.

“But I kept going.”

I waited.

“She asks annoying questions.”

“Therapists do that.”

“You sound experienced.”

“I am.”

We both laughed.

It was strange.

Not comfortable.

But human.

Victoria looked down.

“I watched the video again last month.”

My stomach tightened.

“I don’t.”

“I noticed something.”

“What?”

“You looked at Mrs. Palmer before you looked at me.”

I remembered.

“You were waiting for her to stop it.”

“Yes.”

Victoria swallowed.

“I think that’s the part that bothers me most now.”

“Why?”

“Because I knew she wouldn’t.”

I stared.

“You knew?”

Victoria nodded.

“I knew teachers were scared of my mother.”

That honesty hurt more than denial.

“So you used it.”

“Yes.”

“Why are you telling me?”

“Because apologizing without admitting what you knew feels fake.”

I looked at her for a long time.

“You really hurt me.”

“I know.”

“Not just that night.”

“I know.”

“I hated coming to school sometimes.”

Her eyes filled.

“I know.”

“No, you know now.”

She nodded.

“You’re right.”

I stood.

My five minutes were over.

“Elena.”

I turned.

“I am sorry.”

For the first time, I believed she understood what the sentence meant.

“I know.”

I left.

I did not forgive her that day.

But I also stopped imagining revenge.

That surprised me.

For months I had pictured her humiliation.

Losing friends.

Losing status.

Feeling exactly what I had felt.

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When I finally saw her alone, none of it seemed important.

I didn’t need her to become small for me to become larger.